A Response to an Anonymous Post!

In my article entitled, “What Happened to Civility?,” I quoted from USA today the following, "American society is among the most informal in the world, and often that informality crosses over into incivility. Now, you add the informality of the Internet to this culture, and all bets are off.”
“The ability to comment about others from a distance and with anonymity is the Web's hallmark and its poison, says Jerry Bowles, co-founder of SocialMediaToday.com, which keeps tabs on the impact of social media on society. Bowles' recent blog post lamented the recent erosion of civility.”
“The Web seems to turn most people into adversaries, and in doing so, we tend to lose the ability to really talk to each other," he says. "This is particularly true for politics on the Web, where the comments tend to run to the extremes and sometimes can be downright seditious. I find it scary."
As a general rule, I don’t comment on “Anonymous” posts. Anonymous posts are usually written by people who say things anonymously that they would never have the nerve to say to a person’s face and I find debating with anonymous posters to be a serious waste of time as they tend to read what they want to read as opposed to reading what was written and attempting to understand both intent and content.
That said, I recently received an “anonymous” post with a bunch of questions which you fathers may find helpful as you study this most important topic of whether to send your daughter off to college or not. It is obvious that this anonymous poster has a personal problem with me (as indicated by how the letter is signed), as opposed to a real desire to know, but we will attempt to answer the questions posed. My answers are in parenthesis for clarity.

Dear Mr.R.

Stumbled to this website and appreciate it for what it is but have a question...(Hardly anyone stumbles across this site, but nice try!)
If Christian girls should not become nurses, then are you saying that you desire ungodly women to be the only caretakers of your family members? (This is an example of reading what you want to read not what was written. Christian girls are free to do, become and be anything they want to be and nowhere in my article do I say that Christian girls should not become nurses. I invite you to go back and read the article. Last time I checked, this was a free country. The reference is listed as an example of a true situation and the whole point of the story is that “all decisions” have consequences. Fathers who ignore this point do so at their own peril and the peril of their families. I see danger in encouraging our young ladies to work outside of the home and the Bible warns us that women are to be “keepers at home”. God said it…I didn’t! Here is what I said, “I then asked, so….let me get this straight…you are going to send your virgin daughter off to nursing school, to learn how to take care of patients, give sponge baths to guys, see other husbands in various stages of undress, learn to take care of herself, earn her own income and be self-sufficient, etc. and then honestly expect that when Mr. Right comes calling that she will instantly have her heart “turned” towards the home and be interested in him and him alone? Besides, wouldn’t it make sense that the very things that attracted Mr. Right to her, would be the very things he values in a wife (independence, career, money, etc.)? It would be a rare man who met, found and became interested in a woman in the workplace that would find value in a woman whose interest was being at home! The logic of this would be inconsistent at best. We live in an age that encourages women to work “outside” of the home and Christians who have bought into this model are deceived. Galatians 6:7 says, “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.” If you sow independence, self-sufficiency and discontentment “in” the home with your young ladies, you will reap exactly the same thing and to think otherwise, God says….you are deceived.)
And are you saying that Christian girls that do become nurses cannot have a truly pure relationship with their husbands because they have cleaned the bedpans of ill gentlemen? (This is another example of reading what you want to read. I never said nor implied that a “pure” relationship could not be achieved. I think it would be difficult for a young woman or a young man to see others in various stages of undress and then have “eyes” for his/her spouse and him/her alone. A person either gets aroused or de-sensitized, both of which is bad for the intimacy of a marriage.)
Why should your daughters even bother to learn to supplement income from the home? (Because the Bible says it is wise to do so. Read Proverbs 31.)
Do they not trust that the Lord will send the perfect man that has sufficient income? (Again, you are asking questions about things that my article never states nor intimates. The sufficiency of a man’s income has nothing to do with trusting the Lord. The bible says to “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6))
What about the many nurses that you do know who, when they became wives and mothers, stayed home and properly raises their children? (What about them????? The article is not written about them. Its scope is directed to fathers who are trying to decide what to do with their daughters. Trying to stretch the comments and make them say what you think I am saying is neither fair debate nor honest in intent.)
Did you really struggle financially whenever your wife decided to stay home? (Yes!!! The nature of the question infers that I am not being honest….was that your intent?)
Do you believe that the girl in your post who was unable to finish nursing school is now living in sin with her husband and that her husband was not God's will just because she, in your opinion, should not have gone to school whatsoever? (How ridiculous! I am not sure how to even go about commenting on this question. Where do I state that going to college is sin? ….Becoming a nurse is sin?...etc. etc.
I Corinthians 3:18 suggests, “Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise.”)
I know several young ladies (and some not so young) who met their husbands through e-harmony, what do you think of that? (All decisions have consequences…some work out, others don’t, but that doesn’t make the decision a wise one. That said, I pass no judgment, but I fail to see how this relates to “anything” in my article.)
Training our children to love the Lord first, love their families and serve them, love others in the world and serve the lost should be the plan here! (Who said it wasn’t?)
What about those missionary nurses who had to get training to minister with their missionary husbands? (The article was not directed at Nurses, the nursing field, those who got training to be a nurse etc.)
Did they really sin whenever they went to school but somehow God just forgave them enough to use them on the missionary field? (Really now, it is obvious that you did not read the article….please read it as this question is really reaching at something that is not there!)
What missionary work have your daughters served in? (Serving the Lord comes in all forms and fashion. The answer is yes, they have been involved in many forms of ministry with our family, and they are doing what the Lord has called them to do. One does not have to serve in a “foreign” land to do missionary work. According to scripture, Paul told Titus that “older” women are to teach “younger” women…That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5.)
How do they serve the Lord through reaching a lost and dying world? (The same way any Christian should, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbor as thyself. And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. The idea that a woman who becomes a keeper at home cannot serve God through reaching a lost and dying world is absurd. It is through her relationship with her husband, her family and her Lord that people will see her testimony and be drawn even more to Jesus.)
Oh, teaching music lessons in a comfortable home to Christian students, yes, that's it. (Now…sarcasm here shows the intent of your heart. Who said they only teach “Christian” students. In fact, over the years many of their students have not been Christians. My daughters have reached many young minds and hearts for the Lord through teaching music and in many other ways. God has blessed them with amazing ministries right from our home. I won't tell you all about it and we'll save some rewards for heaven. Following Biblical principles and commands will always yield good fruit. The Bible says, “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” When you demean work in the home and raise up work “outside” of the home, you demean mothers and daughters who have found fulfillment and contentment by leading a quiet life at home.)

Signed,
A parent who is tired of prideful men telling others what to do all the time but leaves out serving the Lord Jesus Christ through ministry. (Whew!....This is what anonymity does! It emboldens people to say things that they would hardly say in person. I am terribly sorry you feel this way, but your argument is with God, not me and you sure don't know me very well!)
Steve Riddell (yep…this is the real me, not the anonymous one!)